Friday, October 9, 2015

COMING OUT!!! (As a Furry)

"Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it." -Bruce Lee, (1940-1973)

This is important. This is a major announcement. I've never been more focused on something I was so self conscience about. I can't stress that enough. There has been enough stress on me already over this and I don't want this to be a part of my life that I have to conceal. I want to be who I am and express it. I want to feel comfortable enough to express it.

So you either came here from one of three ways: 1)You watch my Youtube video which had this link in the description and you wanted to be a good viewer and read my blog entry about this. To which I say thank you, 2) you got here when I posted this link on one of my social media sites, to which I also say thank you or 3) you just happen to randomly find this blog post entry thing and decided to read it, to where again I say thank you.
You can watch the video at the bottom of the post with the the transcript below. It is preferred that you watch the video before you read this post, so you can click here or scroll down. Anyway the following text may be unsuitable for some readers, and is intended for a mature audience.

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So yeah, I'm a furry . . . don't really know what to say after that but yeah, thats the announcement. And if you noticed in the video, I look and feel extremely uncomfortable. I decided not to stand like I normally do, I have a weird posture and composure, I barely looked at the camera, I oddly move around from time to time, and my voice, my voice is a dead give away. You can tell in my voice that I'm extremely uncomfortable and very awkward talking about this.

I first discovered furries back in the 8th grade and been a fan of it (if I can say it like that) ever since. Back in 8th grade I had a phase where I had a thing for werewolves. Don't know why, don't remember why, but yeah, I had that little phase going on for me. That was really how it all started, that was basically the first step. So during the duration of my "interest in werewolves" phase, I somehow came across furries. Don't remember how I came across it. Pretty sure it just some furry artwork of some kind. (I'm pretty sure that's the most common way of discovering furries.) What it was and how I found it I have no idea, but it indeed peaked my interest. And ever since then, I guess I became a furry, even though I didn't considered myself one just yet because I was still just finding out what a furry was.

Now I'm not gonna lie, but at the same I really don't wanna talk to much about it. It's just a subject that everyone thinks of when they think of furries. When I first discovered furries, the Internet is a confusing place. To me, there are two sides of the Internet for furries. The clean side (Safe For Work) and then there's the yiff side (Not Safe For Work).Yiff actually has multiple meanings and definitions but most commonly it refers to anthropomorphic intercourse or furry sex. So of course when first discovering what furries were I saw A LOT of yiff . Yiff is something I'm not particularly into but its not like I'm disgusted by it. I acknowledge it but I don't care for it. Its not like I go and fap to that. I know it exist and I leave it at that. I HAVE NO SEXUAL INTEREST IN FURRIES OR ANIMALS EXCEPT HUMAN.

What I like best about the furry fandom is the freedom of expression. You don't have to worry about who you are, the way you look, your interest, ethnicity or your sexuality. No one is to judge. And for the record, I am straight. Your sexual orientation does not reflect your interest, and being a furry does not reflect your sexuality. Although, the furry fandom has a mixed orientation. Most furries are a lot more sexually open minded as well as I. Something else I also love is the creativity. With furries coming together from all over the world, you get a beautiful combination of furry culture. You get artists, writers, filmmakers (like me) and so much more. You never know exactly what the furry fandom consists of.

As a kid, I used to make believe that I was another animal. It was just part of my normal child imaginative play. It's something that's overlooked by your parent(s), but not as an 18 year old who's supposed to be getting ready for the "real world". I constantly get scolded by my mother to" grow up" or "act my age" whenever I do "Child's Play" or in this cause, "Puppy Play", even though when writing this post, I couldn't really call it Puppy Play cause my mother doesn't know I'm a furry, let alone know what a furry is, so Puppy Play would've been worse. Being able to express myself through this as well as other stuff that I do, is just the way I can cope with the stress of having to face the world. I know I have to face it and I know I have to handle it but sometimes I can't, it just becomes too much. And it's good to know that my mother shuns me for this. "Pretending" the way that I do is just the last bit of childhood in me that has just evolved and grown with me. Like I said in the video it really is my other passion, even though I've never really pursued it until now. Being a furry is just another part of me which just makes me feel good and happy and I want happiness to show through my life.

And for the longest, . . . basically always, forever, and since the beginning of my furry existence, no one ever knew I was a furry because I never told anyone I was a furry. And the reason for that was because I thought and kinda knew it wasn't socially acceptable. It wouldn't really be accepted in the "real" world. It's not something that you would see or consider a grown person to be a part of. Society just doesn't know what to think about it, they don't know how to react. It's common with everything that if you don't understand something you reject it. And when you tell society that you pretend to be some other animal and dress up as said animal, they will look at you weird cause it doesn't seem like its common day to day thing, which it isn't. And people will look at this and think that it is something that's not right, and think that you must be mentally disturbed or something. And rejection is something that I fear. Knowing how people commonly react to furries, I did not want to be rejected for being one. I've slowly been feeling more comfortable with myself being a furry, and "coming out" little by little to the people who are close to me.

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss

I've seen a lot of hatred toward furries. Especially online considering that I've never been open until now, so it couldn't be personal. But after seeing it for so long and after all this time, I have become desensitized to it. Common insults towards furries doesn't bother me anymore. Can't really make a list of them because it's probably very small and I still don't pay attention to it. I've even started calling myself a furfag so that way other people can't use that word against me and also because...I am one. And I'm not the only one. A lot of furries actually own that word and basically take control of it, in fact I'm pretty sure a lot of furries call each other furfags.

The next thing I had to do was accept myself. I literally had to stand in front of the mirror and call myself a furry in order to accept myself as one. And it was strangely the most weirdest, uncomfortable and awkward thing I ever had to do. How do you make yourself feel awkward when it's literally only you? I was ashamed of myself, I was embarrassed. I made myself think that I was socially unacceptable. But then, now that I think about it, it doesn't really affect my day to day lifestyle. Being a furry is not going to restrict me from living my life. Being a furry has never hurt me or anyone as far as I know of. So I don't really care what other people think, as long as I'm just happy being true to myself.


If i wasn't a furry, I really don't know how my life would be different. I doubt it would be any different, I've just been keeping it on the down low, keeping in wraps, suppressing it. I guess I would've had some more free time not thinking about furry things. But then again, what would I be doing with that free time? ... nevermind. But now that I think of it, I wish I was a lot more open a lot more sooner because who knows where I would be now if I wasn't so closed to it. If I could've gone this far with YouTube, I could've made it far as a furry.

The more I think about, there is a lot to actually be proud about. Sure its all about these animal creatures but that's just the surface, the visual aspect. It goes in much deeper than that. it becomes emotional. People use the furry fandom to have a sense of belonging. Its a social hub for the socially awkward (like me). There is a lot of joy that comes out of this. This is something that makes everybody happy. Until you meet a furry in person, you won't know what it's like. Of course, I'm referring to when there are fursuiters in public and they act so adorable towards people who are curious enough to be interested and willing to interact. It goes for both children and adults, although, it's usually the child with their parents (lol). There's also many charities that the furry fandon attributes too. They are actually raising money to help other people. So it helps more than just the people who are furries.

Being a furry is not something I should be afraid of, and neither should any other furs. I want to be a happy furry. I want to be a free furry. Free to express myself. I think I've done that now. I have officially announced to the world that I am indeed a furry, and it feels good. Knowing something that I have been hiding for so long, feels so good to finally let people know. I know its super cliche to say but it seriously feels like a weight has been lifted. In the beginning I was nervous, I didn't know if I wanted to this, but I forced myself to do it, and I'm proud of myself, and I know only good things can come from this. ^^

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OFFICIAL TRANSCRIPT

Stages

Intro

Build up/Setup: So I've been thinking a lot recently, about something kinda personal,(?). And as you can see by the title of this video, it was left blank because I didn't want people to judge the video let alone me before you even watched it and heard what I had to say.

Reveal: There really is easy no way to say this, so I'm gonna straight up say it, I'm a Furry. Yeah shocking that the nerdy, horribly awkward, anti-social, over-imaginative, detached-from-reality, YouTuber, is a Furry, SHOCKING.

Break down: I was never really open about being a Furry because I was afraid of people judging me. Usually when my friends would talk about Furries around me it would tend to be negative, of course they didn't know I was a Furry, and all they knew was the yiff, I didn't want to be associated with that, I didn't want people to think I was some kind of sexual deviant. Yiff is basically Furry sex and that's not what the Furry Fandom is all about. The only reason a lot of people think it is, is because in media, sex sells. When was the last time you click on a YouTube video because it had boobs in the thumbnail? [You might even know about the infamous episode of CSI that viewed Furries negatively. I've never seen the episode and I don't think I want to.]

So if your still watching this video you probably want to know a bit more, you're probably a Furry yourself or at least somewhat interested. My reason for being a Furry is what I assume is for most people. Just an interest in anthros, and also remember, its a fantasy, a make-believe world where we are practically in control, a way to break reality and our real world problems. an escape route. <FurAffinity story> And it reminded me of when I use to pretend I was an animal as a little kid. I had a very active and strong imagination, so it was really easy to get into this fandom, and I never really been part of the fandom because I never had any Furry accounts, Furry friends or attended a Fur-Con. When I was first into the Furry Fandom of course all I saw was the yiff, and it never really bothered me, I was never really into that, I just liked the concept of anthropomorphic animals. The first time I ever told anyone was back in freshman year of high school. I told my best friend and of course he was a little freaked out but he was cool with it because we were friends regardless, and were still friends today and I love him for that.

Extras: Making this video was obviously a big deal for me. I wanted to be able to do this and be open about being a Furry. And the easiest way of me doing that was to make a video. Besides being a YouTuber and an underground dancer, being a Furry is really my other passion. And all I want is to make friends and have fun. and that's really what my channel is all about, and that's what being a Furry is to me, and I think that's a good way to end the video.

Outro: Furry questions, outro (FA)

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©thewackyactions™ Productions

*This video was filmed sometime in April and was originally planned to be uploaded sometime in May after my 'I'M LEGAL!!!' video, but due to other videos and the way I schedule them, it was pushed back.
*Since this was Already filmed a while back, I am much more comfortable now then I was during filming.
*This post was edited continuously since then until published.

Friday, January 2, 2015

WATCH_DOGS Cosplay "Tracking Down"


Pre-Post 

Hey everybody , how have you been? Its been forever since I've been on Blogger, almost a whole year actually, but now I'm back to make another post. I don't miss all this typing. My fingers are going to fall off by the end of this post because there's a lot that I want to say. It has to do with my latest YouTube video of course, which is most likely how you found this blog post in the first place. If not, then from Facebook or Twitter. Oh yeah, just in case you didn't know, those are my main social media's which you can follow me at and say "Hi". (links at end of post) Anyway, lets officially begin this blog post!



Actual Post

So as you should know, I make a cosplay video every year for Halloween, and this year I decided to go as Aiden Pearce from the video game WATCH_DOGS! The reason that I chose to do this cosplay is because I am a gaming nerd which really shouldn't be a surprise, and if it is . . . Surprise! But another good reason is because Watch Dogs is one of the most popular games that came out this year that I personally love! I thought this game was bad-ass before it came out on shelves and I knew I had to play it. So as soon as I got the chance, I bought it! The gameplay was addictive and very entertaining. I couldn't stop playing, I just wanted to continue without stopping. The only times I did stop were when I raged quit. Even at that, I would go back on and play again in an hour.

Everything is Connected



WATCH_DOGS is an open world, action-adventure game created by Ubisoft, released on May 27 2014. (I got it June 17 2014) It's about a man, Aiden Pearce, who wants to go after the people who killed his 6 year old niece. Set in the city of Chicago, Aiden goes around the city, able to hack any Wi-Fi enabled or computer connected device. From computers to traffic lights, draw bridges and steam pipes that explode, Aiden can hack almost anything in sight. You will be surprised how much you can hack in the game. And it's all connect to the ctOS. The ctOS is a supposedly safe Wi-Fi city control system, in which everything and everyone is connected to. Aiden is able to hack into the ctOS network which is how he can take control anything in the city, actually, he is controlling the city.

Ubisoft is also the creator of the classic Assassin's Creed series franchise. I personally love Assassin's Creed, even before I actually knew what is was. It is even known that both of these games take place in the same universe, which shows the technology in Assassin's Creed is not limited to only Abstergo Industries or Abstergo Entertainment. Don't really know what the difference is. But if you look around at peoples profiles, you might be able to find the easter egg where it says that they were a former Abstergo employee. And to add on, the first Assassin's Creed game that I played was Black Flag. But don't worry, I was able to follow it by watching the "movies" on YouTube.

There is actually a point where the story of Assassins Creed 4 and Watch_Dogs do connect. (*SPOILERS*)
In Assassin's Creed 4, there is a part where the CCO of Abstergo Entertainment, Olivier Garneau, must go to Chicago for a conference of some sort. Before he gets to the conference, he is tracked down by Aiden and the phone shows that Olivier is a genetic memory manipulator. His profile even says "Targeted by the Brotherhood". So of course you have to go after him and kill him. Back in Assassin's Creed 4, Melanie Lemay, tells you that he mysteriously disappeared and never arrived to the meeting. Also in Assassin's Creed 4 there is an email chain of files regarding Blume and the CTos. Even some of your co-workers at Abstergo are talking about moving to Chicago and working for Blume. It's more connected than you thought.

Personal view

I over-all enjoyed playing Watch Dogs. Having it made where hacking is the main tool as the game was very unique in my opinion and I haven't seen games like that before. It has the same feel as Assassins Creed where the actions are semi-automatic and there is plenty of parkour which is really fun. I love the overall concept of trying to remain anonymous, going against the authorities, taking matters into your own hands, becoming the vigilante and doing what is supposedly for the greater good. I say supposedly because I believe that Aiden is actually quite selfish. He started hacking for his own gain which is what got him into trouble causing the accidental death of his niece, angry at the people responsible, he then used his hacking skills to go off the grid and track them down, all whilst stealing bank information and cars. Not to mention all the guards he killed who weren't even involved with his nieces death and basically just pawns in a chess game, to get to the people he was actually after. Although, he did intervene with criminals when threatening somebody and rescued women in human trafficking. But hey, that's what makes it have such a strong story and so controversial.

On the other hand, some negative feedback that has been said about the game that I also agree on is that it can get quite repetitive in most of the missions, there were a lot of graphical/texture glitches, the colors were somewhat dull, but I feel like it just makes it look more realistic and the character voices were very low. Not to mention how impossible it was to drive. These were all things that I have experienced when I was playing the game,

Tracking Down - Watch_Dogs Cosplay (re-uploaded)
Story

The story is quite simple if you pay close attention to it. It starts out as me role playing as Aiden Pearce on the computer trying to hack into the ctOS server when a notification pops up saying "You Are Being Hacked". I then immediately begin to back track the source of the hacker and when I have located the source it says "Target Found". I then go out to track him down, hence the name of the video, and go about my normal day hacking everything anything I can, until I come to the location where the hacker is, and I kill him. And then I get my information back. All in a days work vigilante justice.

The making of  "Tracking Down"

Making this video wasn't easy. There were a lot of things I had to figure out how to incorporate into the video. A  major part of that was figuring out how to do the hacking. I basically thought of all the hacks that were in the game and thought, how can I fake this in real life. The hacks and function featured in the video were, traffic lights hack, bank account hack, train stop hack, electrical box exploding hack, criminal activity detector, and of course GPS. All of these hacks were made by doing nothing at all. All that was done was that I timed it precisely and text pops up in the video to show which hack has been activated. Although, there was one hack with a little more than good timing. When you see the ctOS server explode it was real. Well sort of, it was a camera trick. The server was just an old non-working modem with a sticker that I hand made to have the ctOS logo on it. The explosion itself was just a modified lighter held closely (but not to close) to the camera and igniting it.

I also had help by Nick Molinari, and couple of my friends to make this video. My friends allowed me to abuse them for a while (lol jk). They were the awesome actors that help bring this video to life. And Nick also coached me during this video being the Co-Director and the Cinematographer for a good majority of it. (Using big fancy words like that)

***On January 7, 2015, I was given the notification that this video had a copyright claim. I then had to remove the copyrighted music temporarily. I then re-edited the video with copyright-free music and scheduled the re-uploaded video on January 9, 2015.***

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So thank you for watching, feel free to click on any of the links in the blog post and especially the links below.
Special thanks to everyone who help out in this video, You are the best!
If you have any questions on the video (or in general), please contact me on my social media for I never check Blogger unless I'm writing a post, and I'll add the question with my response to the blog. Thanks.

          Extra Links Just For You
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